February 28, 2007
Over the years, it wasn’t enough for me to get tested to see if I had contracted HIV/AIDS, I felt it was equally important that I encouraged others to do so as well. Sometimes people need more than words, they need that physical support and that is what I have provided in the past.
I didn’t just drop them off at the door of a clinic; I went inside and sat with them—because I knew that they were anxious, scared and stressing. Fortunately for those I have taken to be tested, none tested positive.
I do have relatives and friends who are living with HIV/AIDS.
I have watched some suffer and die quickly and others have suffered and still continue to live full lives.
It is frustrating to have to take a young person to get tested today, especially when you are told by that person that there wasn’t even an attempt made to use a condom.
There’s nothing glamorous or exciting about HIV/AIDS. It’s not “flyy” to have some-thing as deadly as HIV/AIDS when it could have been prevented.
My sisters, listen to me when I tell you that the person out there you want to be with should be someone you want to live for, not die for. I know he looks good, smells better and there are things that he does that give you a feeling deep down inside, but those looks and smells, as well as that feeling, last a short while and STDs last much longer.
I hope to encourage you to avoid having sex until you are mentally, physically, spiritually, socially and also financially able to deal with whatever can result from your actions. But you don’t want to hear that.
Will you believe me if I tell you that if you give yourself some time, you will have a much more enjoyable experience? Will you believe me when I tell you that the person you are with in your teens you will probably barely remember five or 10 years later?
Since there are more and more teenagers who are testing positive for the HIV/AIDS virus, it is clear that while I am advocating for abstinence there is a reality we all must face—people are having sex and many are not using any form of contraception.
Using a condom is the smart thing to do because you don’t want to get pregnant and you don’t want to test positive for any sexually transmitted disease and especially AIDS.
There is nothing fun or “flyy” about going to the clinic, waiting for the results, telling a partner (hopefully there is only one) and dealing with whatever treatment is necessary to bring relief.
Sisters, sexually transmitted diseases can itch, burn and ooze ugly colored matter from your vagina. You can develop sores that make your vaginal area look like an alien—discolored, slimy, crusty and covered with spots and bumps. And let’s not forget the smell—maybe you have detected the foul odor associated with diseases and infections. Those smells can range from mild to severe—from a smell similar to canned tuna to the equally repulsive smell of old sautéed onions.
Females have to be careful about the smells that come from their vaginas. If you think that others don’t smell it, you are sadly mistaken. Men will talk about you and sadly women will also and they won’t tell you.
This is sad because if you have one of those offensive smells, something is definitely WRONG! If you detect a smell, go see a doctor immediately. Prolonging your decision to seek help is the wrong decision.
The Rev. Rae Lewis Thornton, during a recent interview, talked about people living with the HIV virus for so many years before being detected. Unfortunately by the time they are tested, the disease has done quite a bit of damage. Rev. Thornton’s message is clear, “Love will not keep you safe, a condom will.”
Rev. Thornton has lived with HIV since testing positive in 1986. Since 1995, she has lived with AIDS. She is not singing a sad song and asking for pity. Instead, she has dedicated her life to educating people about the importance of wearing a condom and getting tested, especially if you are having unprotected sex.
March 4-10 is The Black Church Week of Prayer for the Healing of AIDS and March 10 is National Women and Girls HIV/AIDS Awareness Day.
My young sisters, and older ones too, please don’t let the good looks, money, smooth talk or any other trappings keep you from putting yourself first. No matter how good that feeling gets to you, you need to understand that you have to use protection.
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